Recently, I took my boys to see some of my family. It’s about half a day’s drive; not too bad but, you just never know how it will go. I packed us up: car activities, movies, tablets, snacks, and hit the road. I’m a huge fan of road trips. You get to see so much that you’d miss if flying. This wasn’t so much of a journey as a get-from-point-A-to-point-B kind of trip, although the scenery was beautiful.
This week-long vacation was a bit new for us. In the past, dad came along with us and we had stayed at my parents’ house but, this time, we would be staying with my sister, which meant new surroundings and one less parent to lean on for support. So, I braced myself for trouble. I fretted pre-trip and worried each day as to how the next day would be. As you may know, new surroundings, new circumstances, and non-typical people all can throw a wrench in the works for our kiddos. But, it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. The boys got to see their Nana and Papa each day and had two aunts to play with.
Each day started early, relaxing with coffee on the patio. We visited, listened to the coo of mourning doves and enjoyed the cooler temperatures. As is typical of the high desert, by late morning it was very hot so, we spent most of our time at the pool, where there was a beautiful, shaded lounge area off to the side, along with music, snacks, drinks and laughter. The water was warmed by the sun and we were the only ones around to enjoy it. The very definition of summer fun.
Now, E had taken swim lessons a few years ago. He got quite good and loved it, until one fateful day he was practicing with a small float board that darted out from under him, and he thought he was going to drown. Though he did get back in the water after that day, he seemed to enjoy it less as his worries and fears got in the way. Mr. C never did end up with much in the way of lessons. He hated the feel of the water on his skin, he hated that it felt cold, etc. I now understand that this is part of his sensory processing disorder but, at the time, I just didn’t get it.
But, I digress. These previous experiences added up to a new set of worry for mama bear. Are they going to enjoy it? Will they have fun, or will they find something new to be afraid of? Will they be able to use life vests or floaties? Lions! Tigers! Bears! Oh, my!
Thankfully, all my worry was for nothing. The boys did amazing! E preferred to use a life vest so that he could have full use of the pool without the fear of sinking. C didn’t care if he had it on or not. By the end of the afternoon that we arrived, C had his face in the water with a snorkel and mask, swimming from one end of the pool to the other. By the end of day two he could do it without his life vest. This is a kid who was nearly eight before he could stand to get his face wet in the bath. When speaking to his aunt about how he learned to swim so well, he said, “I just watched the techniques and practiced them. I basically taught myself how to swim!”
This kid cracks me up! No humility there. And boy, is he fearless! He went from not really having lessons, to snorkeling, to trying to dive and swim under water. He even tried surfing on a boogie board!
On a few occasions, friends from the area came over so their kids could swim, and C would appear to be happily swimming by himself at one end but, we caught him slyly watching the other kids. He would see something new and then want to try it. He even asked them for pointers. Thankfully, the other kids were wonderful, and had great manners so, it went very smoothly. Social skills practice? Check!
E took a bit longer to feel comfortable in the water. In fact, it wasn’t until our last time in the pool that he braved his fear, and took the life vest off. I’m so happy that he did. He did amazingly well– his skills came back to him easily. He was even able to swim short distances under water.
On another day, we decided to play at the nearby lake. Again, local friends to the rescue. We were provided with a private beach to play at, which included a shaded cabana, giant buried trampoline, kayaks and paddle boards. Now, I personally have kayaked only once in my life but, I remember loving it. Unfortunately, I’m still in recovery mode from my back surgery in May and didn’t feel comfortable joining in the fun. I had to satisfy myself with wading into the water or lounging in the cabana with drinks. (Awe, shucks!) It seemed like a too-good-to-be-true type of place. For E though, it was. There were dragon flies, regular flies, bees and other flying things out. It didn’t really bother me but, for a kiddo with phobias (Entomophobia), they were swarming! He had a mini panic attack. Thankfully, we were allowed use of the friends’ house as well, and E was able to be inside in the cool air, away from the “horrific” bugs.
As a mom, that day was frustrating and hard for me. I wanted him to have the same experiences as everyone else but, I knew he just couldn’t. I was frustrated that I had to monitor him, and broken-hearted that he just can’t have fun like the rest of us. Having my family with us was a great support though, and they shared the responsibility so that we all could have moments of relaxation and fun. What really surprised me though, was, that despite his fears, E would, occasionally, make the trek from the house to the water and jump in a kayak or on the paddle board, and head out onto the lake. For a little while at least, he could lock those fears away and try something new.
Both boys just blew my mind. They had never been in a kayak or used a paddle board before, and yet, they were so good at them! E loved being out on the water. He’s always been drawn to water. Seashores are his favorite. He finds it soothing and peaceful, which is a wonderful thing for someone with an anxious mind. It was such a confidence boost for these kids to excel at something.
All in all, we had an amazing getaway, and I have been beaming with pride and awe at how well my boys did. They are champions! I am such a proud mama!